I’m currently sitting in the Austin airport waiting for a flight to Dallas, where I will get on a flight to New Orleans.
And yes, I’m aware that New Orleans + New Year’s eve Carissa could potentially be a dangerous combination… but I’ve made a vow to myself to be on my best behavior.
Besides, I may have doomed myself to sobriety for the next few days anyway. You see, this week my immune system decided to take a vacation. It’s not like I really blame it… everyone wants a little time off around the holidays. Plus its been working over time since every single person I know has been sick. Regardless, it left me hanging on to my sanity and chugging disgusting emergenC while I watched my lymph nodes swell up to the size of grapes.
My throat started aching, and there has been an aching in my right ear, and a constant throbbing on the right side of my head. To make things worse, I now have a giant fever blister growing out of my chin.
HAVE I MENTIONED I HAVE TO GO TO A REALLY NICE
WEDDING THIS WEEKEND?
And that’s not even the worst part. This morning as I was choking down my cocktail of pills, I accidentally took a leftover flagyl from the bacterial infection I had last week. You probably don’t know this, but flagyl is the worst drug on the planet. Literally.
You know how most doctors warn you not to drink on certain drugs? And then you ignore them because you know that alcohol just lessens the strength of the meds, and usually does a better job of making you feel better anyway?
Well with Flagyl they basically tell you, that if you mix flagyl with alcohol you will want to die. Or maybe you will die. I can’t remember.
Needless to say, immediately after accidentally ingesting the flagyl, I called poison control to let them know that I’m going to NOLA for a few days, and asked them what I should do. I also told them that I had drank a glass or four of wine the night before, and would I die? He let me know that I probably wouldn’t die, but I might have massive stomach problems. Luckily they’ve only been minor so far. I think that means I’ll be ok to drink by tonight. Right?
So here I am, in the floor of the terminal, bored out of my mind because my flight has been delayed 2 hours. I have already watched everything on my kindle, and ate a giant $6 dolls bag of chez mix, which am just realizing was intended to b 8 servings.
I also found out that if you pour a gallon of foot powder in your shoe to try to mask the horrible odor, you may be embarrassed when it pours out all over you while your luggage is being checked.
Farewell for now.
Also, excuse grammatical errors. I don’t feel like proofreading.
Update: 3 delays and 1 cancellation later- I have now spent 6 hrs sitting in airports today, and I’m only in Dallas. Also, why is It that I never have to pee until I’m in the air and the food cart is blocking my way?
HYPOTHETICAL LESSON OF THE DAY: if you are planning on using the “squat” method in a public restroom (as you should), you should always grab a wad of toilet paper ahead of time. Other wise you risk the chance of there not being any toilet paper in your stall, which would leave you squatting (and possibly) dripping on yourself until you find some tp. Hypothetically.