Jeff Goldblum and his twins can up your bathroom experience by 1 million %

Since I’m weird and random and like to google weird random things when I’m bored, I found out that I missed out on an incredibly interesting fad.

A few years ago some genius, and I do mean genius, created a site called “Jeff Goldblum is watching you The site is no longer active, but from my extensive research- (one quick google search) it seems that the whole site was simply dedicated to this picture.


I think there was even a movement to try to get people to print out the picture and post it in bathroom stalls around the world. I know the site is no longer active, but I think I’m going to do it anyway. Maybe I can restart the movement… because goshdarnit, I would die of laughter if I went into a bathroom and Jeff Goldblum was watching me poop.

Or maybe I should switch it up a bit.

This might sound strange, but I’ve always thought that Jeff Goldblum looks nearly identical to Orlando Jones, yaknow- except for that whole skin color thing. So I’m thinking we intensify the whole movement and replace Mr. Goldblum with his identical non-twin…

Orlando Jones is VERY INTENTLY watching you poo!!!!

Orlando Jones is VERY INTENTLY watching you poo!!!!

But then again, my mom (always one to tell it like it is) once told my friend Moops that he looks exactly like Jeff Goldblum… So maybe I should go the obscure route and use his pic instead…

Moops is reaalllllly enjoying watching you poo!

Moops is reaalllllly enjoying watching you poo!

(Isn’t it incredibly absurd that 3 people can look so much alike-ish?!?)

So I think you should all print out that last pic and hang it up in restrooms worldwide. I’m thinking this could really catch on. Or not…

And just so you know…

John Cusack is NOT watching you poo because he's too busy making out with Carissa

John Cusack is NOT watching you poo because he’s too busy making out with Carissa


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  3. TMI Thursday: Everything comes down to poo (not mine)
  4. EEEEFML: A visual presentation (vol.2)
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  • phronk

    That's a big “ish” :)

    I fully support reviving this movement though. My poop would be so much more pleasant if this picture was in every bathroom. Like, I'd have trouble pooping, but I'd be more entertained when it finally came, you know?

  • Nikki

    To me…John Cusack is a relationship man, and I think he cares about what color/texture your poop is. He wants to know you're a healthy.

    Wait…I don't want that kind of relationship.

  • Elise

    Oh God! I think I would poop myself laughing (even if I didn't need to go) if I saw that in the bathrooms! This MUST be reserected!! I will start on the Southern Hemisphere immediately.

  • Mwa


  • ScoMan

    I think Orlando Jones is my favourite.

    I want to be part of this movement.

    Can I be the head of Australia's distribution and logistics?

  • beckeye

    That's so funny. I'd never heard of that site. Jeff Goldblum is from Pittsburgh though, and we Pittsburghers love to watch people poop.

  • Lucy

    Oh, my gosh they all do look alike, odd, but I don't want anyone watching me poop, yuck!!! (lol)
    Oh, and I knew you would have to some how put a picture of John Cusack baby on the post, I love him too!!!!

  • jeneypeney

    Someone put those up in my dorm bathrooms my sophomore year and I did, in fact, laugh hysterically.


  • lifeonahanger

    Taylor Kitsch will also never be watching you poop because he's too busy gettin' it on with Julie…that ok with you?
    I'm supposed to be finishing my paper DUE IN THREE HOURS but I'm commenting on your blog…BECAUSE THAT'S HOW AWESOME YOU ARE. booyah.

  • JustMe

    Pllleaase print that out and do it. On just a few places. I would ALSO die of laughter if I saw that.

    But then I'd accidentally think of “The Fly” and get grossed out.

  • Dani

    I'm thinking this would be incredibly effective in the ridiculously tiny bathroom stalls where your knees freakin' touch the door. If awkward is hilarious, awkward at like 4 inches away is even more so.

  • thebacksofmyeyelids

    1. That was not JC's best shot.


  • Sada

    Whoa! Dude, Orlando Jones is TOTALLY Jeff Goldblum's brother from another mother. But I'm not seeing it with Moops. I'm sorry. Don't tell your mom.

    p.s. Thank you for keeping John Cusack away from my fecal matter.

  • Candice

    Hahahaha, that was actually a site? Amazing.

  • hillbillyduhn

    Holy Balls that's funny! LMAO

    Okay, so I don't have any of those peeps lookin at me while I poo, but I do have a painting that I did by my toilet of a girl shedding a tear. She gets rave reviews cause everyone who potties wants to know, why is she crying. I reply: “Simple, she just smelled yer poo!”

    Not everyone thinks that's as funny as me. But I'm sure you appriciate it. Or not. Who cares, I liked it and that's what counts right? Right!

  • thatkindofgirl

    Dude, I'm freaked out by how alike Jeff Goldblum and Orlando Jones look! Good catch, dude.

  • RondaMarie

    Yep, had that picture posted on my bathroom door for over a year, cuz I'm classy like that.

  • vodkalogic

    I think if Jeff was watching me poop I might get constipated, he is a weird dude.. I don't think your friend looks at all like Goldblum.. your friend is cuter..

    And when you are done making out with John Cusak can I have a turn. :)

  • SeanRamblings

    John Cusack looks disturbed about all this poo watching talk. :)

  • BobbiJanay@Kid to a Grown Up

    Really girl you are crazy.

  • Sadako

    They kind of do look similar–Orlando and Jeff. My uncle is dark skinned and a lot of people say he looks like Jeff Goldblum (and I do, too!).

  • Karisa Tells All

    I think this is a great idea. Instead of limiting it to just one person watching you poop though, I think we should just make it a meme like lolcats. We'll call it “lolpoopwatchers” or something.

  • ambermurphy

    I think it would be interesting to be a fly on the stall and watch several of my ex-lovers take dumps. Then, I could do a study and see whether or not their poo-face resembles their o-face.


  • Kimwithak

    Powerful stuff here! :) Especially that last one.

  • Alyson

    I am behind this movement 100%. No pun intended.

    Except I think I might like to use pictures of my Grandma instead. “My Grandma, also known as Jesus's watchdog, is watching you poop.”

  • Pollypoptart

    The lastest line of this post was my favourite and keep enjoying the snogathon with J.C.!!! You deserve it! :)

  • Andhari

    Hahaha Jeff Goldblum looks the scariest for the bathroom stall for me.

    John Cusack is pretty fierce in that picture..

  • Sherri

    Oh jesus, I just typed a big comment about how I call people who look like other people, yet have some defining difference like gender or skin color “bootleg versions” of the person they resemble – but stupid Disqus lost my comment. I can't duplicate the funny so BOO. :(

  • Kelltown

    I found this because I, too, have always thought Orlando Jones and Jeff Goldblum are secret twins. And I wondered how many others shared my opinion. (so I googled it). Moops, however, looks nothing like Jeff or Orlando. Maybe it was a bad choice of picture? I just really wanna see the similarity but I don't. That's all.

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