I don’t know how to do those post it notes that are so hot right now.


It’s true. I’m pretty much an idiot when it comes to technology. But I’ve really been enjoying the post it notes that quite a few people have been posting on Tuesdays. At least I think it is on Tuesdays. I don’t know where my head is these days.

Anyhow, I really have been enjoying reading the “Post It” Tuesdays, but really don’t think I could condense my bitching into a single post it note even if I tried. Though I would love to try if someone would be willing to tell me where you get these “post its.”

I guess for now I’ll just go with “slightly longer than a post it note Tuesday.”

___________________________________

Dear bloggers who do post-it Tuesdays,

How do I do this? And by how, I mean where do you get the post it’s? I’m sure it is very simple, but I am computer illiterate.

Please and thank you,

Wants to be a member of the cool kids post-it club

________________________________

My beloved dog Stella,

As much as I love you and love to cuddle, I cannot really be expected to do so when you smell like sour milk. I am not sure whether or not you have been sprayed by a skunk out there in the country, or if you have been purposely rolling around in cow patties all day, but either way… your scent has become intolerable. Even after putting you through the struggle of a bath, you have continued to smell of rotten cow carcus. I have no choice but to exile you from my bed.

Your ex-cuddle bear,

Cold at night

stella

___________________________________

My bathroom,

Please get your shit together.The bottom of the toilet has been leaking for weeks, my make up drawer is straight up hanging there by a tiny piece of wood, and the shower takes about an hour to drain. I try to treat you with respect and you just keep on making my life more difficult. I really can’t afford the time or effort needed to call a plumber or to fix your problems myself.

I suppose will take blame for pouring the hot wax down the sink causing it to get clogged,

Mistook hot wax in a candle burner for hot oil!!

_________________________________

Dear Pizza Hut Delivery guy,

How dare you?? My sister, my dad and I drove around for over an hour looking for a pizza place that was open on Thanksgiving night. We finally gave up and settled on Denny’s.  Precisely 2 minutes after I ordered my biscuits and gravy, you walked in holding a stack of warm, fresh, pizzas. My Thanksgiving was already on the shitty side, and you had to come in and rub your deliciousness in my  face.

Shame on you,

Didn’t need it anyway

pizza man

___________________________

To screenwriter J. Michael Straczynski,

I hear that you been given the task of writing both the remake for Forbidden Planet as well as the very anticipated screenplay adaptation of World War Z. Don’t fucking blow it. Please.

Trying hard not to judge you by your work on Ninja Assassin,

Film nerd

__________________________

Dear purse,

I know people talk shit about the state in which I keep you. I do it for both of our own good. One of these days I will be able to fulfill my master plan of being able to pay rent from the change that collects at the bottom of you. Either that or spend an entire day playing Photohunt and Tic-Tac Trivia at the bar.

-Doing everything for a reason.

purse contents

____________________________

Impulse buy facial mask,

You promised to moisturize my skin while leaving it more firm and with less wrinkles. As far as I can tell you are a scented wet paper towel with holes cut out for the eyes and mouth. Speaking of the holes, the ones on your masks are not designed to fit the facial structure of any human. I can’t get it to stay on  my face unless I lie down, and frankly, I feel it made me look like the dude from Silence of the Lambs.

Why did I buy 6 of you!?

-Buyers remorseful

______________________________

Dear Kitchen,

Thank you for letting us destroy you this weekend in a massive food fight. That was the most awesome time I ever had in our house, though I’ll never be able to eat off your counters again without imagining smears of gravy and mashed potatoes.

Sorry, (not)

Still has potatoes in her hair

food fightfood fghter

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  • http://bellyshirts.wordpress.com Kirsten

    I love this post it note thing! If you figure it out tell me too please.
    Also, my purse insides look like yours. I always try to keep them clean but it never works.

    Also, in mine I always throw candy in it, then the candy melts so the inside of my purse is coated with a fine layer of chocolate (but not in a good way, its in that state where it is chalky and gross.)

  • http://www.spleeness.com spleeness

    haha, food fight = fun. Freaking hilarious.

    I have buyers remorse over a mask which was supposed to suck out blackheads but instead acts like drying plaster about to make my face crack and fall off!

  • http://jmb1980.blogspot.com/ Jessica

    Here are the little post-its. Go to this link and fill in the box, click create and if you like it save it to your computer and put them on your blog! Have a good one! http://wigflip.com/superstickies/

  • MoodyBelle

    hey check this out! Directions and instructions on how to get your own post-it notes! :)

  • http://www.worstdamnblog.com Josh

    How the fuck do you do this????

    I'm so confused. What is “Post It Tuesday”??? HELP MEEEEEE

    OK. That should do. Until one of you comes to my rescue I will just be here in waiting….staring off the port bow… REEF THE SAILS MATIE, TIGHTEN THE ROPES TO THE MIZZENMAST, STEER INTO THE WINNNNDDDD!!!!

    OK, I need to quit reading book about boats. I'm turning into a damned pirate. I like booty, but not enough to make me plunder everyone else's chests. I'm happily married.

  • http://twitter.com/IDoThings IDoThings

    Post-it notes? WHAT? How is there a cool thing going on that I don't know about? I see Jessica has provided a link below. I'm on it. Meanwhile, I will lay in wait for that screenwriter of World War Z, ready to kick his ass if it isn't great.

    Could you write a letter to my lower intestine and find out what the hell is going on with all this gas right now? Thanks.

  • http://www.onesteptorecovery.com starzskymoon

    POST-IT's LADIES!!! http://wigflip.com/superstickies/

    Some lovely fellow blogger took the time to email me this information today. I am blessed to know such lovely people as yourselves. Go there; make your post-it and DAMNIT, POST-IT!!!

    Carissa – I gotta say, your purse and my purse are probably fellow twins in this world because mine is probably just as bad. I literally don't keep the top shut because I know that if I start to do that, it will take a downward spiral to dirty and rotten . . .

  • http://houseofcline.blogspot.com/ alicia

    haaa! you crack me up!! oh man…rotten cow carcass??? lol…and i totally want to have a food fight now!!

  • shineoutloud

    The food fight looks awesome!

  • http://www.blogsareforlosers.com Sherri

    You think you're not in the cool kids club because you don't know how to do Post It Tuesdays? I don't even know what you're talking about. How's that for not cool?

    I say you just dump the contents of your purse down the shower drain. Maybe all those pennies will unclog it.

  • CarissaJaded

    Someone explained it down below… I'm def. gonna give it a real shot next week!!

    HAHA I always have candy and come at the bottom of my purse!! I have really made an effort to change my ways, but so far, nada!

  • CarissaJaded

    I've never had a mask actually do what it say it does!

  • CarissaJaded

    Thank you so much! I will definitely do this next week!!

  • CarissaJaded

    Yayyy ! thanks!

  • CarissaJaded

    I'll have to explain it in a how to for you Josh… in the mean time… keep the pirate talk dude… it suits you matey!

  • MoodyBelle

    No probs darling! :)

  • CarissaJaded

    Everyone is doing it!! Or at least 10 people in my reader and I love it!!

    haha if your lower intestines happens to answer, I'll be sure to let you know… mine obviously has no clue how to fix itself either… But I believe they hate me for having 3 thanksgivings.

  • CarissaJaded

    It makes me feel a lot better to know that other people keep there purse as dirty as mine, and my car, and under my bed. Why does my life keep accumulating like this!?

  • CarissaJaded

    Food fights are fun… but I'd probably stay away from using rotten cow carcass during the fight…

  • CarissaJaded

    It was! Really kinda got out of hand though!!

  • CarissaJaded

    I may have to try that!! I have a feeling all the vitamins that have made their home on the bottom of my purse might not be great for the water recycling center… but who am I to know for sure!

  • beckeye

    Awww, your poor, banished, stinky doggie!

    I don't even know what these post-its are.

  • http://thebacksofmyeyelids.blogspot.com/ PJ

    Okay, Carissa – Promise you will explain what the heck the post-its are AND how you do it when you find out…pinky swear???

    This post was a lot of fun to read, but the last two photos made me want to get up RIGHT NOW and clean something! Everyone knows that food fights are only fun when done in public places or someone else's home…where you don't have to clean up afterwards! 😉

  • http://www.ftcs.wordpress.com/ Clevelandpoet

    I'm very excited/worried about World War Z. I loved the book and think it can be great on film. My messenger bag fills up with the most random of things…..perhaps I'll have to join in the post it fun…..

  • lifeofmb

    OMG I am so jealous of your food fight. Probably haven't had a good one since the 6th grade.

  • Peny55

    Interesting my daughter

  • Peny55

    You are such an interesting daughter.

  • http://awkwardchair.blogspot.com yoga ninja mama

    *jumps up and down* yesssss! i've been wanting to do this fo-ev-uh. JOY!

  • http://awkwardchair.blogspot.com yoga ninja mama

    ohhh carissa, my purse is worse than yours. i need to dump it out and take a picture of all the BS in it so you can grasp the level of TRASHED that is my purse. i'm pretty sure there may be rodents in it at this point.

  • Yankism018

    A Blonde suspects her boyfriend of cheating on her, so She goes out and buys a gun. She goes to his apartment unexpectedly and sure enough, she opens the door and finds him in the arms of a redhead.
    Well, the blonde is angry, She opens her purse to take out the gun but as she does so, she is overcome with grief. She takes the gun and puts it to her head.
    The boyfriend yells “No, honey, don't do it.” The blond replies “Shut up, you're next.”

    respect
    Johnson
    ______________________________________________
    Colorado mortgage