Update on this morning’s post…


I’m  even a worse person than I thought.

In case you didn’t see my last post, I pretty much demolished a bird yesterday.

There’s something else I failed to tell you.

Yesterday morning, I had a very close call with a squirrel on the way to work. I had just exited a school zone, so I had quickly sped up to try to make up for lost time. There was a car coming towards me on a very thin street.

The squirrel ran out in front of me, tried to cross the street, saw the other oncoming car and turned back towards my car. The last glimpse I saw of it, he had nearly made it to the side of the road, and I didn’t feel like I hit anything- so I was pretty sure he was in the clear.

Tonight my roommates and I decided that since we were going to completely blow our diets, we would walk to the grocery store. I was just telling them about how I almost hit a squirrel “right here.” when my roommate Jakerz  pointed to a still, lifeless squirrel on the side of the road.

That’s fucking double homicide yo. I think I qualify for any gang now.

I figure I can either:

A. Get a pet squirrel to try to redeem myself for my murder (much like I did when I found out that rat poison worked on a rat in my house.)

B. Tell myself I didn’t kill two animals in one day. I just have a vivid imagination and the blood on my tire was just from a cherry pie that some bird stole off a window seal.

C. Eat a bag full of sunflower seeds, drink a bottle of wine, and join an anti PETA GROUP.

I’m still undecided, but I’m leaning towards C.

Reblog this post [with Zemanta]
Share

Related posts:

  1. Post it note Tuesday and update for your face.
  2. Carissa’s Yearly Update Newletter
  3. A new net won’t catch an old bird, but an old car will…
  • http://belleandnel.blogspot.com/ Belle

    C. Definitely C. Also, buy one of those PETA shirts that says “People that Eat Tasty Animals,” and then you'll be set.

  • thatkindofgirl

    Oh, dude, always err on the side of sunflower seeds. They're a snacktivity!

  • http://twitter.com/Carissajaded Carissa Jade

    haha I'm working on my kill an animal-feed a human political action video right now…

  • http://twitter.com/Carissajaded Carissa Jade

    I agree. They are so freaking awesome- they need to have their own food group.

  • http://belleandnel.blogspot.com/ Belle

    C. Definitely C. Also, buy one of those PETA shirts that says “People that Eat Tasty Animals,” and then you'll be set.

  • thatkindofgirl

    Oh, dude, always err on the side of sunflower seeds. They're a snacktivity!

  • CarissaJaded

    haha I'm working on my kill an animal-feed a human political action video right now…

  • CarissaJaded

    I agree. They are so freaking awesome- they need to have their own food group.